CONVERSATIONS

"One of the greatest pleasures of life is conversation."

                                    Rev. Sydney Smith (1771-1845)


Some people today would argue that "conversation is dead".  I would say if you consider it an interactive communication between two people, it is very much alive.  It has just evolved into other forms besides face to face, eye to eye situations.  Even e-mail and Facebook have fallen out of favor with younger generations, left in the dust for twitter, snapchat and texting among other newer iterations of communication.  With each new technology, without human contact, it leaves room for misinterpretation, impulsivity and even anger.  You can be a social isolate and spend your entire day on your computer, tablet or phone and hold court with thousands of people you may or may not know.  For me, personally, born in the 1940's, nothing can replace sitting down with someone for a chat, experiencing the personal give and take as well as the possibility of building a true connection and, perhaps, even friendship.

After 44 posts on my blog, I have been careful not to become repetitive or to repeat myself but, if I do, I ask my reader's forgiveness.  This blog will be about conversations and chance meetings I have had over the years with people of fame or notoriety.  I am not one to take "selfies" with these people, satisfying myself with my memory of those moments.  It is usually a one-sided affair, however; that is, they, in all likelihood, have no memory of me or that moment, but I certainly do.  The one common denominator I find is that we are all human, starting and ending at the same place, wherever that might be.  A movie star, politician, or sports hero is just a person, no different than we are...at least I tell myself that as I approach them.  But, those moments have given me some wonderful and, at times, surprising memories, some more momentous than others.

I will just discuss a few and in no particular chronologic order.  Some resulted in conversation, some, just a smile or a grimace...but all somehow communicative.

Perhaps my earliest recollection of interacting with famous people was when I was 8, attending a Cub Scout Pack meeting.  In attendance was a small contingent from the New York Giants football team.  Our pack leader obviously had some connections and invited them to come chat with us about their on-field adventures.  They were pretty humble back then in the '50's, not being paid the megabucks our pro athletes are paid today, sitting down on the gym floor with us.  The two I really remember were Alex Webster and Ben Agajanian (the kicker without a big toe!)  I still value their autographs today. The takeaway I have from that evening was that, once upon a time, little kids did have heroes!

Alex Webster

Another brief sports-related interaction, albeit sadder, occurred when I was in Las Vegas several years ago.  I was walking alone through the mall at Caesar's Palace and, as I passed a storefront, someone from within shouted out to me, "Hey Mister, do you want an autograph?".  I stopped and peered into a darkened store where I saw a man sitting all alone at a table, trying to hawk his signature.  It was Pete Rose.  Although I didn't take him up on his offer, it left me with a profound sense of sadness that the very heroes I've just mentioned often fall from grace into disrepute, forsaking their fans.

Pete Rose, as we'd want to remember him...a very sad individual today

In 1994, I was flying to Boston for the wedding of a friend's daughter.  It was to be a direct flight which, however, got cancelled, so they put us on a flight to NYC to connect to a Boston flight.  There were no coach seats and we were bumped into first class.  Engaging in conversation with my seat mate, I learned he was the Chief Photographer for Kodak and he, in turn, learned I was a Pediatrician.  Somehow we got onto the topic of problems kids go through and he shared that he was one of Fred Rogers best friends, yes, THE Mr. Rogers!  While it was only an hour flight, I told him how much I admired Fred for the all wonderful programs he presented to, not only my kids, but all children.  As we were landing, we exchanged business cards.  Two weeks later, I went to the mailbox and found a parcel wrapped in plain brown paper with the return address of one Fred Rogers.   I anxiously unwrapped it,  revealing a framed photo of Mr. Rogers with the handwritten inscription "For Dr. Sandy Mayer, with kindest regards and gratitude for all you do to help children and their families,  Fred Rogers".  It quickly became my proudest possession, occupying a place of honor on the wall of my office.  Kids would excitedly ask me if I knew him and I would respond in true Fred Rogers fashion, "He is my friend"!  So, while not actually conversing with him, I, somehow, felt I knew him.

We are avid supporters of the Glimmerglass Festival in Cooperstown, NY, featuring operas and many other events throughout July and August each year.  As patrons, we are often invited to events to meet some of the the singers, dancers, guest speakers, conductors and composers.  About three years ago, while attending a dinner gathering, I was mingling around the outdoor terrace and saw a man standing alone.  I asked him if he was a singer or a dancer.  He laughed and said, "Oh no, I'm a US Marshal!"  "What brings you here", I responded.  "I've been the Justice's detail since the beginning...would you like to meet her?"  It immediately came to me who she was as he took me over and introduced me to Associate Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, realizing she was a huge opera fan and is frequently at Glimmerglass.  They even produced a one-act opera, "Ginsburg/Scalia" about their friendship and mutual love of opera.  She actually had a walk-on role in one of the two presentations.  I stood about a physical foot taller than her but she was far taller in stature than I was.  I knew she had had a long, contentious session and I thanked her for all she does for America.  I wonder how many times someone actually thanks them.

RBG!

In the political arena, I have been fortunate to meet some unforgettable people...like our three hour breakfast with George McGovern a few years back, previously discussed in this blog (see post of 5/16/18), discussing the history of the Viet Nam War and the resultant national unrest.  I have had some very brief interactions with Robert F. Kennedy (questions) and Lyndon Baines Johnson (handshake).  My most recent political meeting (other than a long chat with my Congressman) was just about a year ago in Penn Station while I was waiting for my train home to Rochester.  I was wearing some old blue jeans and had a knapsack on my back.  A well-dressed younger man approached and stood next to me, texting on his cell phone.  I glanced over and did a double take.  "Excuse me, sir," I asked. "Aren't you Senator Booker?"  "I am," he responded with somewhat of a bashful look.  Again, at a shortage for words, I did what I always do...I thanked him for the work he's done in the Senate.  My knapsack slid off my shoulder onto the ground.  As this 70y.o.+ man bent down to retrieve it, the young Senator said, "oh no, sir, let me get that!" I don't know if his kind gesture will affect my Primary vote...we'll just have to see.

Sen. Booker

In the realm of entertainment, I've had short chance meeting with film stars such as the time I mistakenly walked into Jack Lemmon's dressing room as he was drying his hair as I was searching for a fellow cast member who was a family friend. (see blog post of 1/6/18), questions from the audience for Meryl Streep, Farley Granger and Richard Widmark as well as the cinematographer of "Apocalypse Now", Vittorio Storaro ( It helps to live in the city that's home to the George Eastman Museum that frequently hosts movie stars that present their films and have Q and A's...Julia Roberts is next month!!!).  I did have an opportunity to chat with the lovely Isabella Rossellini.  I reminded her that her mother, Ingrid Bergman lived here in Rochester while her husband, Peter Lindstrom, was a medical resident here at Strong Memorial.  That's when Ingrid, traveling for work, had an affair with Isabella's dad, Roberto Rossellini.  Of course, we didn't broach that topic!

Ms.Rossellini

Some of my friends, including my wife refer to me as "The King of Schmooze", a title I take great pride in.  You never really know a person until you have some words with them, preferably in person but through the written word as well.  We're all just people!  I'm sure there are other situations I haven't mentioned but I look forward to many other encounters.  While I'm sure all these folks I've met over the years, if they're still with us, would never remember having a conversation with Sandy Mayer, I certainly remember them!